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04/06/01
(continued)
The
real birthday fun page...
As promised, here are the birthday poems submitted by
readers which, honestly, completely made my week. I should just turn
this in to a funny poetry site, you creative bastards, you.
Here goes. First one is from my pal Winter. She says it's
influenced by listening to children's music at the behest of her daughter:
All around at Omar's site,
the kitty chased the cat yummys
Cuz it's tough to break multinationals
When
Meow
Goes the tummy
Cosa's got no time to sigh
As banks extend another buy
So kiss off quick, it's off, it's spent!
Meow
Goes the 3rd World Debt!
This
one's from Eileen:
Happy be you?
I hope so.
much.
very much.
From my North Texas buddy Angi:
There once was a lad who took Geritol...
In fact, he did not have much hair at all....
It is is Omar's big B-day,
Yet he acts like it's D-day,
So he wants us to Karaoke and have a ball!!!
omar.
he's funny.
he gives me work.
he likes me.
he really likes me.
there's someone on my website
that searches for omar's name
every day.
like, six times.
and omar keeps playing the innocent.
but i finally caught him.
because i don't know
who else in the world
is searching for "omar and pamie naked"
or "pamie confesses her love for omar"
or "i wish omar would fuck me all weekend."
so,
i'm onto him.
but, you know,
he's kinda funny.
and there's this painting
on vermont
like a mural
and it's supposed to be
johnny depp
but they changed a few things
to his face
and his coloring
and now he looks just like
omar.
omar watches me eat eggs on saturday mornings
and i kind of like that.
Terribly Happy, never too sappy;
Gives wisdom and laughs, just like my old pappy.
Omar of Texas, his mad skilz perplex us
I wish for his birthday I could buy him a Lexus.
Monty sent this,
but first the explanation:
Okay, this is a double-dactyl (See www.stinky.com/dactyl/
to read the complicated rules for the form):
Bonkadoo Zonkadoo
Terribly Happy
is Updated often
with Stories and quotes;
Incomprehensibly,
Omar the webmaster
Wanted as birthday gifts
Poetry jokes.
Anna
sent these three haiku. Damn, girl. Triple action:
omar's birthday soon
omar is not a fatass.
happy birthday, o.
thursday we rejoice
omar turning twenty-what?
you can't tell your age?
mailed your package,
yes inflatable girl named sue
ain't that what you said?
A haiku from the lovely and talented Rachel:
Poems aren't hard.
You said *funny* poem, though.
That's too much pressure.
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