This is the weekend where I finish off painting the bedroom and putting up curtains to make it a decent place where good, decent American folk can sleep.
This is the weekend where the laptop finally arrives, even though I had to chase it around the bowels of the UPS infrastructure. It's been like they're all out buying new shorts or something.
This is the weekend when my parents come to celebrate a belated birthday and I finally get to see what my dad's been schlepping around in his trunk for a week.
This is the weekend where I plan to sleep very very late on Saturday. Nobody better wake my ass up.
This is the weekend when I finally try to mow my lawn. The weeds now have signs on them that say, "Jack, climb me! I'm the best Beanstalk!"
This is the weekend when I'll file my taxes. The circumstances around their completion are filled with mystery, secret code and covert phone calls. I keep expecting them to come in a plain envelope that says, "CONFIDENTIAL: ALIEN AUTOPSY PHOTOS INSIDE."
This is the weekend when I mop the tile floors. The bugs are complaining that they can't put on socks and slide across the floors and do their little races anymore.
This is the last weekend before I'm scheduled to write six Smallville recaps in a row, all the way to the end of the season. I plan to say goodbye to Mr. Sun after this weekend.
This is the weekend when I comb my cat. Cosa's got loose hair coming off like she's escaping from a town that suffered a nuclear meltdown.
This is the weekend when I plan to drink a ton of coffee just to see what'll happen. I've already started writing coffee poems just to get in the mode.
This is the weekend where I catch up on about 23 hours worth of TiVo'd programs. Keifer Sutherland? You and I got a date this weekend. Ozzy Osbourne? You'd better be there too.
This is the weekend when I get some rest.
This is the weekend that better hurry up and fucking get here already.
Two things and then I'll leave you alone.
I saw Robin Williams the other night in concert. Wrote a review about it. Like ta hear? He'it goes...
Also went to see The Sweetest Thing. Like my review, time won't be kind to this one.
That's it. Go have some fun, now.
"Oh, sure, laugh. Your babies are next."